Argh, barely warmed my seat and Clarice is going out again soon. Later going some restaurant to celebrate granddad’s birthday. Yawns, I want to sleep. Headache~

Yesterday, met Shirlyn at Orchard after school to look for our halloween costume. Couldn’t find the maid costume I want, ended up buying some student uniform. $59 la wtf!

At night, went over to Shirlyn’s house before heading to St James to club. Clinton came at 11pm. Finished the other half bottle of his Hennessy. Was pouring damn a lot of alcohol into his cup, and we successfully got him drunk. But so did Shirlyn. Zzz. Saw vincent, gerald (as usual) and guanjie there. Ooh, guanjie knows shirlyn’s friend. What a small world. Stupid vincent’s friend keep stepping on my leg. And I kept stepping on this guy’s leg. Mine was accidental though. Damn paiseh. At first not seh one, after that two shots of tequila then abit high liao. And clinton can’t walk straight. Hahaaa. :P

At 4am, (being really serious) byonghee really came st james to get me. Omg. <3! Haha. Pei shirlyn wait for jy to come fetch her to alvin’s house. Stupid jy. –.- come only don’t wna let me go. I fuck care ah. Where I go also none of your business la. To think he was actually that childish, to tail byonghee’s car. Wtf?! That was so totally unnecessary. Sorry for causing you two to be dulan, I didn’t know jy was such an inconsiderate person. On a side note, he still owes me $250 and he isn’t even feeling the least bit paiseh about it. Wth. I should start charging interest. There goes the opportunity cost.

Anyway, byonghee lost him after making a sudden turn. We went to some Mac in toapayoh to eat my hashbrown (which was so fuckingdelicious). ^^ After that went back to his house to sleep. I never thought I’d actually be back here again. Damn. I think I’ve fallen in love with his bed, and his blankie, and ruanmianmian. Hee. Okay, I should turn back while I can.

I shan’t mention what we did today morning, which left me with a body of bruises and scratches. Thanks for that too man.

Took a train to Orchard to get clothes from the supplier, then took a bus back home. I still love long bus rides. [:

i don’t know who you are, but i’m with you;
clarice

I think I’m tired. Tired of being who I’m not. I’m afraid of being who I am. It’s like I can never be who I am in front of you. And you will never know what I really am, behind this facade. It’s tiring really, to maintain things this way. I miss the way life was at Shanghai ; where I had all the freedom I want ; where you weren’t a factor of my decisions ; where I could take control of my own life ; where I could be myself, every single second.

I’m sorry I had to treat you this way. I’m sorry I have to stop it all now. But I’m tired of hiding. I’m really sick and tired of interchanging between who I am and who I’m not. Maybe I should just let it be. All of these have made me so negative towards relationships.

I need a brand new life. I’ve gotta be strong, and move on.

It isn’t gna be easy, but I’ll make it through. So can you.

but i do do feel, that i do do will,
missyoumuch
clarice

clarice got her new lappy todayyyy :D {HP dv3} <3!

Shirlyn didn’t go to church today. After church went over to tampines to meet clinton. Watched a movie <Halloween 2>. What a gory movieeeeee. After movie, took a bus home.

Chilled out at the balcony again, reading the papers. The balcony is a nice place man. At night went to parkway and I got my new laptop. Was deciding between sony vaios and the hp dv3. Damn, the pink sony vaios is like damn chio. In the end decided on the HP one, cos I think its more value for money. Graphics card better also.

Urgh, school starts tomorrow. x_x

nope, not today;
clarice